What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

I’m not sure what’s unique about me or my story. Isn’t everyone unique in some particular way? Isn’t that the beauty of the human story? What distinguishes me? There’s people who are far more incredible and inspiring, trust me on that.

So maybe I can write a little bit about my transformation and some of the lessons I’ve learnt along the way since coming to this beautiful shining city. For most of my life I was very much content in my quiet ways. A small group of friends, books, paintings, work. I guess I still am content, but I was distant from the world. I watched as life swung from left to right in its infinite pendulum.

So I came here with the intention of doing business as usual. I spoke little and I had no desire to draw attention to myself. But then you meet some people who say the most profoundly absurd things you just can’t stay quiet. Be it in class (least favorite time to speak) or big social gatherings (hate those), or telling the waiter theres a fly in my soup (‘cuz the poor guy is already hating his job, why add more?). Anyways, something happened. Something that changed me forever. I learnt the power of words. Of believing what you say. In thinking things through before communicating. I learnt that language can be thought of as a mathematical formula. Words, like numbers, have to be weaved together in the most direct and yet graceful way possible to reach the correct outcome. We can always say ‘1+1×1+2=4’ but ‘doesn’t ‘2+2’ just sound and feel infinitely better. It has a juicy crispiness to it just by saying it. 2 plus 2.Words have a weight to them. They can move or destroy mountains. Words, and words alone, have lead nations to the brink of collapse, have damaged marriages beyond repair, have lead armies to mass suicides. Words are powerful. Don’t forget that. But just having the right words isn’t enough. You also have to SAY them the right way. Intonation, pauses, volume, repetition, body language, my God the list doesn’t end. But these things are necessary, because if you don’t carry these words like they’re yours, then no one is gonna listen. If you don’t sound like you believe in your own words, why should anybody else?That’s one of the lessons. Speak up any time you can. Be nervous, be shy, be anxious. It happens to everyone. Just know these things go away, little by little, every time you choose to speak up. It could be when you want a raise from your boss, or when your boyfriend does something that troubles you. Or when the waiter needs to know there’s a fly in your soup.

After learning how to communicate (because I was an ape before), I met alot more people than I hoped for. I mean you’re all very nice but there’s simply too many names…Well I met you wonderful people and got to know you very deeply and honestly. As you too got to know me (which is your problem now). And it occurred to me that there’s something lurking beneath the surface. A recent study showed that an average adult in their 20s and 30s today has the same anxiety level of a mental patient in the US in the 60s. That’s a crazy statistic. There’s pain out there. Maybe we can’t change this pandemic in a day, but we can start by being more understanding of one another. The person in front of you could have mountains of responsibility on their shoulders and yet serve you with the brightest smile on their face. I’ve always believed that treating people with respect and politeness is the cheapest skill to acquire. It literally takes nothing. Be demanding. Be challenging. Be assertive. But don’t forget you’re dealing with someone that one day might be doing you a favor and you’ll need their memory of you to be clean. So: respect and politeness. Add that to the arsenal.

Guess that’s it. This really isn’t my story because I don’t have much to say in that regard. So this is our story. Or said differently, this is what I learned from your journey that you’ve generously included me into. I hope that I’ve added some value.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

Something invisible but essential about me is that I have an anxiety disorder.

In February 2010, I had my first panic attack. I remember that day like it was yesterday. Something felt off, and as I walked into the kitchen to tell my parents, my entire body went numb, my hands cramped up, and I couldn’t see anything. The next few hours were a blur.

I woke up a few hours later with an IV in my arm and my parents sitting at the end of my hospital bed. The doctor came in and explained that I had experienced a panic attack, but because I was so dehydrated, I would need some fluids before they could send me home.

For the months leading up to this moment, I had been getting sick to my stomach and often feeling lightheaded and exhausted when I had to stand or be upright for a long period of time. It wasn’t until the panic attack that I realized I had been struggling with anxiety for years.

Anxiety is defined by the Webster dictionary as, “an overwhelming sense of apprehension and fear often marked by physiological signs.” What that definition doesn’t tell you is that often times you don’t know what you’re afraid of or what is triggering your anxiety. It also doesn’t tell you that the symptoms of anxiety differ from person to person often making it hard to diagnose.

In my case, anxiety presented itself in the form of feeling sick to my stomach and extreme fatigue. Common symptoms of many different types of illnesses and in my case, years of not understanding what was wrong with me.

Following my panic attack, things began to click for me. I had an answer to what was happening, and I finally had something that I could focus my attention on understanding.

Having anxiety hasn’t been easy, but it has taught me some important things. The top three things I have learned are:

1. It is okay to not be okay. There have been days that I struggle more, have a hard time going about my day or want to hide. On those days, I take a moment to listen to my body, slow down and try to be more mindful about what I’m feeling.

2. It’s important to look at situations from different perspectives. Things aren’t always how they may seem initially, and if you react too quickly, you may limit yourself from understanding more about what is happening.

3. Finding balance in life is important. Having anxiety has enabled me to explore things and listen to myself in situations that I may not have thought to do so before. I have learned that I love to exercise and have a routine, and those things help me to stay balanced.

At first, I was upset that I had this uncontrollable reaction that seemed to pop up out of nowhere at the worst possible times, but over the years, I have found that my anxiety has actually helped me more than it has held me back.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

One of the most extraordinary things that I have learned from the MBA is that every soul within it has a story that deserves to be listened to. I am going to tell you one that will give you a sense of who I am.

I have been always an intrepid soul, seeking new adventures to fill my life backpack. At the age of 26, I decided to quit my job, a very stable and well-paid job, and move to Australia with all, and just my savings. You are never ready to settle 17.180,26km from family and friends, my main pillars in life. I was eager for unique experiences, astonishing landscapes, and riveting nature. I felt ready to live the time of my life.

Nothing further from reality, the setback while landing was difficult to encounter. It was not an easy task to get a job, regardless of how much energy and motivation I carried. All my skills, my experience, my English diploma… suddenly, I was down on earth again. It took me 3 months. I arrived in Sydney with all my savings, and as you may imagine, 3 months in Australia without a job is a task difficult to endure. I decided to join a position that did not require any competence: food-delivery rider.

There I was: electric bike, helmet and an isolated bag. A job that I had never thought of doing, but a job that couldn’t make me happier. I was joyful, merry, lively. I had never felt this way on my way to work. I had the opportunity to penetrate into the heart of the city; while waiting outside of big chains I made friends who were coming across the same life introspection. I was glowing, thriving and excelling when it came to the most important job in my life: seeking happiness.

Why is this story invisible but essential?
I used to hide it during stressful and competitive job interviews. I even felt ambivalent when recruiters used to ask me about my Aussie experience.

Until I joined the MBA: I joined ESADE full of biases, questioning my background, my strengths, my assets… and here I realized how valuable I am, mostly, thanks to experiences and stories like the one conveyed in this post.

Never question yourself. Every experience will fill you with marvellous and special knowledge. Sometimes, it is so invisible that you cannot see how essential it can be.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

Figuring out my ‘invisible but essential’ was a long haul. Hope to convey my journey through this small article.

As a kid, I always had an itch for curiosity and ventured into everything I could. I tried Music, Dance, Sports, Literature, etc. only to find myself lost. Time taught me that life is too short to learn and experience everything. The more I got exposed to new territories, the more indecisive I became. So, I resorted to a simple solution that can serve my curiosity and also help me draw the line. The solution was to answer this simple question: What’s the purpose?

I chose Electronics engineering out of curiosity. Tinkering with the transistors and resistors seemed fun, but I couldn’t answer my question of purpose. What am I achieving? Do I love doing this?-No concrete answer.

During this time, I bumped into an Entrepreneurship course during my summer holidays. Every session was exciting and I also launched a modest venture that marked my inaugural earnings. That’s when it became clear to me that business was something that bites my brain every time. So MBA was clear in sight.

However, MBA is not less than a madhouse. Every day I had to choose and prioritize among all the opportunities that it offered. Finding my purpose in every small event simplified my decisions to carve my unique journey.

Sometimes, our roads lead to dead ends. Hence, going with the flow is not always beneficial. We need to learn to draw the line to strike the right balance. My journey of curiosity and finding purpose represents my invisible but essential.

Cheers.

Apoorva

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

Sometimes, the things that matter can be difficult to spot, even though they play a big role. These hidden qualities have two things in common—most people don’t notice them, including ourselves, and they can make a huge difference or be really important for other things to work well.

An essential but invisible trait I possess is the way I see things from a unique perspective. I grew up in a family where everyone had prowess in Finance, but I was different. While they liked numbers, and easily identified patterns, I had interests in literature and understanding abstract ideas. As I grew up and started my career, I often found myself choosing to do things differently, even when others thought it wasn’t the clearly favoured choice.

It wasn’t until I went to business school for my MBA that I understood how valuable it is to be different. We often feel like we need to do what everyone expects, but that’s not always right. When I started my MBA, I wondered what someone like me, whose experience majorly spanned around the arts, could bring to a class full of people who were experts in consulting and finance.

During my time in school, I realized that my way of looking at things in a different light was actually a strength. Asking “why” about almost everything helped me connect with people, contribute to group projects, and make a difference in my class.

I soon learned that all the unusual choices I had made in the past led me to one of the best MBA schools in the world. And I know that these choices would also be important for whatever I do next in my life, no matter what it is.

I like to remember something Steve Jobs once said: “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.”

So here’s to making different choices, even when they don’t seem to make sense at first.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

I was born into a family in Turkey with a rich heritage spanning two generations in the fields of science and medicine. This familial legacy significantly influenced my educational path, leading me to attend a science-focused high school and ultimately pursue a career in medicine during my college years.

Throughout college, I had the privilege of undertaking two transformative internships at prestigious institutions in the United States—Harvard and Columbia Medical Schools. These experiences were invaluable in terms of knowledge and skill acquisition. Still, what truly stood out for me was the exposure to a diverse, multinational environment. It was within this multicultural setting that I forged deep and meaningful friendships that significantly influenced my decision to pursue an MBA in Barcelona later in life.

In Turkey, after graduation, it is customary to complete mandatory service. Following medical school, my first professional assignment led me to an emergency department situated in the culturally vibrant southeastern region of the country. This environment was marked by its exceptional cultural richness and remarkable diversity, delivering an unforgettable and enlightening experience.

Subsequently, my career path led me into the pharmaceutical industry, where I came to appreciate the immense significance of workplace diversity. Engaging in vibrant, constructive discussions and the exchange of ideas within a safe and inclusive environment has been a tremendous privilege.

Additionally, I actively contributed to projects related to rare diseases, where I keenly felt the significance of my contributions to improving human health. These experiences underscored the importance of each step I took in addressing these specific conditions and enhancing overall human health.

Throughout my personal journey, I’ve developed a profound appreciation for the transformative power of embracing diversity, not only in one’s personal life but also within the professional realm. This realization significantly influenced my decision to pursue an international MBA experience, leading me to choose Esade as the ideal platform for my academic pursuits. Just as the timeless wisdom suggests, ‘We are the average of the five people around us,’ I wholeheartedly endorse the belief that diversity serves as a catalyst for enriching and elevating this collective average. In diverse settings, we have the unique opportunity to broaden our horizons, welcome a wider array of experiences, and evolve into more empathetic and inclusive individuals. This growth, in turn, holds the potential to positively impact and advance society as a whole.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

We all experience moments in life that challenge our beliefs, touch our hearts, and reveal the significance or frivolity of our existence. For many, these defining moments occur during youth, when our souls remain pure and fragile.

My childhood was truly remarkable, and I am forever grateful to my parents for that. Still, there were challenging periods when I had to drag myself through difficulties.

For me, one such defining stretch occurred a few months before my fifteenth birthday. The decision to continue my high school education in the city away from my hometown was initially far from pleasant. Living apart from familiar habitat and trusted companions felt like a “sudden hit to the face with a bat” by life itself. I admit, adapting was a struggle. Yet, as resilient as human beings are, I managed to endure and squeeze out the best for me.

I don’t intend to present a grand life lesson here, but I wish to emphasize that sometimes the smallest, least visible changes hold the utmost importance in shaping who we are today. Reflecting on that time, its seeming insignificance belies the tremendous impact it had in defining me.

Dear reader, allow the subtleties to strike the core of your heart and challenge your beliefs. Then assimilate what holds value for you and disregard the rest.

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

My invisible but essential journey began when I was just 10 years old. I was sent to a boarding school, which taught me independence, but unfortunately, it also amplified my reserved nature and lack of confidence due to bullying.

In new environments, I often felt uncomfortable and struggled to make new friends. It wasn’t until I went to China after high school that I discovered a completely different side of myself.

Moving to a country where English wasn’t widely spoken, I had no choice but to adapt to a new routine, culture, and lifestyle. I met people from all corners of the world who, like me, had moved to a foreign land, leaving behind the comfort of their homes. Our shared experiences of uncertainty and confusion while navigating life in China brought us together. During my three years there, I embarked on solo hiking trips to small cities like Shaoguan, worked as the only non-Chinese employee in a company in the quaint town of Wuxi, and even featured in advertisements for various international brands. These adventures instilled in me a newfound sense of confidence and independence.

When I joined ESADE, I was eager to share this multinational experience with my classmates, all thanks to my time in China. As the saying goes, “So much of who we are is where we have been,” and I couldn’t agree more. I encourage everyone to learn from and build upon their past experiences, surround themselves with loved ones, and be curious, always.

Thank you for reading xx

Tushita

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

Ever since I was young, I’ve been fascinated by human behavior, trying to understand what drives people to do what they do and be who they are. Despite this, it was not until recently that I got to know what motivates me to become a better version of myself, so I’ll share my story:

As a child, I was reserved but had no trouble building meaningful connections with others. Making new friends and trying out new things has always helped me get a sense of what I liked (and disliked). As I progressed through my school years, I also became aware of some of my strengths and weaknesses. However, the idea of deciding who I wanted to be or what I wanted to do seemed fairly distant.

Unfortunately, life goes by very fast, and as you grow older you have to take decisions that will shape who you become. I have always enjoyed travelling and learning about foreign cultures so when it was time for me to go to university, I was happy to have the opportunity to study abroad in Vancouver, Canada. Throughout my undergraduate years, I met some amazing people from all over the world and learned a lot, but I still didn’t know where I wanted to be when I concluded my studies.

At my family’s suggestion, I moved back to Peru and became involved in the family business. I wasn’t very excited about it at first, but soon I became immersed in the world of business and construction.

Every construction project is like a puzzle; unique and challenging. It brings together people from different disciplines and backgrounds to complete a single objective. Success in a project doesn’t come in a single day but is achieved through the persistent effort of many dedicated professionals. Finally, there is a sense of satisfaction that comes from completing a project: whether it’s a house, a road, or a hospital, new infrastructure always brings new opportunities to society.

My experience in the family business helped me realize what I was capable of and what I wanted. I learned that motivation is important to achieve success, no matter how big the challenge; what motivated me throughout those years in the family business was knowing that I was helping to build a better future for those around me. To this day, I continue to challenge myself to achieve that same objective by pursuing an MBA at Esade.

So, if you ever find yourself in the face of uncertainty, be open to new opportunities and follow your heart. You’d be surprised to see what you can find!

What is invisible but essential about YOU? or ESADE? or Barcelona?

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve had to temporarily say goodbye to my fellow classmates and as I settle in to a summer in the States, I’ve spent some quality time reflecting on my MBA experience so far. While there were many high-highs and low-lows, I can confidently say the highs outweigh the lows. When I had decided to pursue my MBA abroad, I was looking to have my mindset and lived experiences as an American challenged. I wanted to push myself outside of my comfort zone and immerse myself in an environment where English wasn’t the main language and the culture was completely different. Now that I have had a month to relfect, I can comfortably articulate what makes me Invisible but Essential. To simply put it, privileged, something I never considered myself to be prior to moving to Spain.

Growing up in the United States as a Black woman, there’s many trials and tribulations one faces as part of the Black community within our own country. Whether it be the Black tax, cultural appropriation, socioeconomic inequality, racism and even unconscious bias, many aspects of being a Black American are deeply systemic and it can be hard to even put into words the effects that this has on individuals, even for myself.

I grew up in a single family home raised by a mother who instilled a hustler mentality in me from a young age. My mother often worked two jobs to ensure I was able to attend private school up until age 12 and live in school districts that had some the best public schools in the state. From a young age, I was inspired by her hustle and sacrifice and made it a point in my life to work hard not only set myself up for success, but to make her proud. From working as a grocery store bagger at 14, I’ve at times held multiple jobs at once in effort to support myself throughout my undergrad and even now within my MBA journey. Because of this upbringing, I never considered myself privileged, but solely a hard worker. I knew that if I didn’t hustle and figure out how to advance on my own, my family nor the country where I was raised could support me.

People look at America as the land of opportunity. And while that may true, people of color, whether that be Hispanics, Blacks, Asians or Native American, as well as those within the LGBTQIA+ community, often have to work twice as hard as their Caucasian counterparts. This has been made even more relevant in 2023 considering LGBTQIA+ marriage, affirmative action, legal abortion and student loan forgiveness has all been struck down by the US’s Supreme Court.

Part of the reason I sought out to live abroad is due to this idea that my social rights may not remain intact. It’s a scary time being a minority in the States, especially as a Black woman. I remember doing my research before moving to Spain and seeing minorities in Europe being treated well and overall feeling safer. The complete opposite to the uneasiness i felt growing up in my own country. But when I arrived in Spain, I never thought people would consider me privileged.

I must say I felt ignorant when I learned of the trials and tribulations my peers go through from a visa perspective. I didn’t know the extent passport strength played in someone’s life until I moved abroad and I admit, that’s the American privilege I hold. But what has made me feel invisible is the lack of identify I felt at times because I am considered “just another American”. In reality, my experience as a minority within America is completely different than to some of the peers I share a Nationality with.

As I’ve edited and rewritten this article in the past month and thought about my MBA experience, what makes me invisible but essential is my upbringing and the fact that I am the only Black American woman within the cohort. I am appreciative of everything my passport affords me from a global perspective, but I want my voice and experiences within my home country to be known. I’m seeing this next phase of my experience as an opportunity to speak more openly about the things I’ve faced. I no longer want to see these types of discussions as a tokenization of my background, but more as a way to educate my peers of the not so beautiful side of America. Although I may feel invisible at times, I know what makes me essential.